Western Baul Podcast Series

Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For… Why? (Matthew Files)

February 17, 2022

A conversation with Bono about the meaning of U2 lyrics is parodied in this talk about the spiritual search. Matthew wants to know why Bono still hasn’t found what he’s looking for. The search is rooted in dissatisfaction, a feeling that something is incomplete or missing—whether it be about mundane things like money or relationship or the spiritual search for God. We can lament or be proud of the search, which can be a racket that we enroll others in. It is a human condition that seems normal since everyone is involved in it, but it perpetuates suffering. We can’t search for something that we don’t know already exists. The body is always in the present, which is why it’s useful to be in touch with it. We can perpetuate the search in spiritual practice—for example, by meditating as if that is going to get us somewhere. We may not see clearly that we are seeking, but seeing what we are doing is needed in working through the knot that keeps us searching. Something happened for great Realizers and the search ended. We cannot stop the search by force of will. The only thing sillier than searching is pretending that we’re not. The search is not a mistake; its origin is the Divine itself. Carrying our own cross involves taking responsibility for every aspect of our lives. Matthew facilitates groups that support people to look deeper into their process, formulate their own questions, and become responsible for their choices.

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